Pulling rank or Pulling your weight

If you have to pull rank to get your way, maybe your way isn't all that great.  If the only leg you have to stand on is the fact that you are the Master / Sensei / Sifu / whatever, then maybe you should reevaluate your position.

Leadership should make sense, and rules should have some basis in logic.  Instructors who run their academies by brute force are the lowest type of fake leaders I know.  Insisting on being obeyed, regardless of the validity of one's position, shows weakness rather than strength.

Grandmaster Jhoon Rhee 2011

I am blessed to be part of the Jhoon Rhee International organization.  Every year I am amazed by the example that is set by Grandmaster Jhoon Rhee.  Quite honestly, it's hard to live up to.

The original motivational speaker: Mom

I think I was exceptionally lucky to be born to parents who were both educators.  They automatically taught my brother and I that we can do anything.  They programmed us to try new things, to try again if we messed up, to analyze failure but not to dwell on it.  They always believed in us, and so, we did too.  And like most kids, what I believed to be true about myself, I assumed was true for everyone else.

When I listen to motivational tapes and read success books now, much of it hinges on similar principles.  Beliefs have in impact on

Teacher... or, Keeper?

What makes someone a teacher and not just a keeper?  I know people who call themselves teachers, instructors, and coaches, but they are certainly not all equally capable in those positions.  It's not enough to watch over students and take them through their paces.  Teaching has to be more than that.

(this is hard to discuss without being insulting, I fear, so stop reading if you are the queasy type)

Imagine a pre-school classroom, filled with seven young children and one adult.  Clearly, we want the adult to be "in charge" and "responsible" but, simply being present in the room doesn't necessarily mean the adult is skilled as such.  For anything constructive to happen,

Pet rocks, good... Pet students, bad

There was a little girl who road my bus when I was a kid, and she was picked on by some of the older kids.  One day, they threw her sweater out the window.  Everyone's parents got called and we all got in trouble.  I wasn't too worried since other people were the ones who picked on her, so imagine my surprise when I got the "I'm very disappointed in you" lecture from Mom.

Turns out that I should have helped that girl, instead of standing by.  "But Mom, she's weird." (Good answer, right?)  So with her typical wisdom,

Yes, actually you ARE ready for graduation

Okay, it's rare, but sometimes I do have students who are ready to graduate even though they think they need more time.  Often this happens for Black Belt exams, since we would all like to have more time to prepare ourselves for those.  As an instructor, we have to make sure students are mentally and emotionally ready so they don't get stagnant or complacent.  For them, it's about facing fears and taking on challenges.

Sometimes it's about the elusive perfection, or a student has compared themselves to someone else in class.  Either way, the instructor has to remove that student's self-evaluation (which is flawed), and establish the proper standards for progress

No, you are NOT ready for graduation

Did you ever try the "Mom, all my friends are doing it" approach to get permission for something as a kid?  I'm sure, like me, you got the standard response, "If all your friends jumped off a bridge, would you do that too?"  That was before bungie jumping, so I really had no come-back, but if she asked me that question today, I might just have a snappy answer!

So what happens when a student notices that all of his classmates are graduating, but he isn't?  What is your standard reply when a student thinks they are ready for the next belt level and you know they are not?

Ending a friendship ... Firing a student

I was a bit socially awkward as a kid, and when I got invited to hang out with a b-list cool kid one summer, I couldn't believe my luck.  Mom took me shopping for a new bathing suit and sent me off for some fun.  It was a great bathing suit... turquoise and pink one-piece, with a flattering cut for my tentative 'tween figure.

As we were getting ready to go to the pool, my social-ticket friend saw that bathing suit and said, "Hey, why don't we trade suits... I'll wear yours and you can wear mine."  Now, let's not even think about the hygiene issues, because there weren't any in those days.  Just focus on the dilemma: brand new bathing suit ... potentially important friend.